How Boehner Gets His Boner?

You know, there's a lot of crying over how 'Murica is broke and we don't have any money and we can't have a single payer national healthcare system...because.....SOCIALISM!
Do you know what we can have?
Penis pumps!
Penis Pumps Cost U.S. Government Millions, Watchdog Cries Waste
There has been so much controversy about birth control and abortion. Because.....RELIGION!
Penis pumps are costing the taxpayer "$172 million between 2006 and 2011, about twice as much as the consumer would have paid at the retail level." Because why go to the store and get a pump for cheaper when Medicare gets you one for free. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
While I read this article I mentally tick off all the things we can't pay for, Like Headstart and school lunch programs, food stamps and unemployment benefits.
You know what 'Murica really needs? That's right, more hard-ons.
Which makes me wonder how many geriatric congresscritters and senators have one of these?
 Is this how Boehner gets a boner? Who knows? How much time have these cretins wasted fighting against giving Americans decent healthcare, or argued about women having access to pills for family planning and we give away pumps for penises without notice or argument.
Because penis trumps vagina every time.
If you think we've made progress, just check out what we're willing to spend money on.
Does anyone remember Sandra Fluke? This woman was raked over the coals by Fright Wing moralists and was not allowed to testify before the Senate Oversight Committee about requiring the health insurance industry to cover birth control. She was called a "slut" and "prostitute." You know what? She had to pay for her own birth control. But we, collectively pay for penis pumps.
Where's Paul Ryan's indignation at this waste?
Who are the real prostitutes here?
I hear all the time that "things are getting better" and "just wait, it's going to come back"
Just like the magical pump that can bring the penis back to life. Maybe for 10 minutes or however long until the magic fades away and you are left with the deflated reality that "things aren't like they used to be."
Whether it's the broken economy or women trying to attain some kind of economic security by not being forced to have children before their ready, we can't continue to act like we live in a sane, logical, rational, society where healthcare and justice are meted out fairly, not as long as we can afford penis pumps but not decent healthcare for women and yes, that means access to birth control. So pump away and spend money and time chasing your youth and perhaps impregnating someone who might not be enamored of carrying your DNA to term. Just don't be surprised when the abortion word comes up as a result of your free penis pump.